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100 Funny Typos from my Graphic Design Blog Stats

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Part of the fun of running a graphic design blog is getting to see how people find the site through Google. I recently took a look at my analytics, and found some crazy typos and hilarious search strings! While most of my traffic comes from other designers through Twitter and other graphic design related sites, search still generates a large percentage of traffic – no matter the intent of the searcher! In looking at the search terms used to find my site in Google Analytics, I would occasionally notice a typo or odd phrase, along with the occasional very-random search string that somehow landed a visitor on the site. Taken on the whole, condensed from about 4000 different search strings from the last few months, the typos and odd searches make an entertaining read. Some of the typos and strange phrases are made with some frequency due to perhaps the layout of the QWERTY keyboard. Some are just funny! Either way, I have presented them below by order of frequency and then alphabetically. The key to getting traffic to my graphic design blog has been writing new material with a relentless focus on what people are searching for. But as you can see, I do get some visitors who end up here by mistake! I hope this humorous list provides some insight for your own blogging adventures, if any, or at least some insight into human nature and how people use search. I have provided some commentary on most of these because it was too fun not to!
  1. freelace graphic design portfolio Might want to check near your shoelace for that…
  2. how to get graphic design work over 50 Pretend you are 30 and see what happens.
  3. what happens when you print a image that is 72 dpi It comes out of the printer looking really bad. Take an look close up…
  4. can i print a 72 dpi image I think you mean “may I print…”
  5. david airey font He doesn’t have a font, but he does have a designer hat and socks.
  6. graphic design fail And why does my site come up for this search?
  7. +”freelance” +”graphic design” +”what to charge” Could you be more specific?
  8. 21th graphic design That’s easy. Just look for the 22th and back up one.
  9. abstract sketches of furniture If it’s abstract, how will you know you found it?
  10. bai logo Bai! You can has logo!
  11. beer typeface To find a beer typeface, you need beer goggles. A pint of Guiness should get you started.
  12. best grapich designer Talk to the best lgoo desginre and I’m sure he or she kowns someneo.
  13. best typohraphy fonts loho I hreatly suhhest hetting a new keyboard to avoid this ehrehious error.
  14. best-fonts-combination Try the use-less-hyphen approach for much-more-accurate results.
  15. can i draw graphics like google analytics I don’t know, can you?
  16. can you get a fifth color in cymk printing Let’s see. CMYK = 4 color process. The answer is no (unless you mean spot color 🙂 ).
  17. can you print a 72 dpi image Test: hit print and see what happens.
  18. can you print online images at 300dpi? This question will never, ever go away.
  19. chirdlike You have been pwned by chirdlike reasoning.
  20. converting from 72 dpi to 300 dpi to print No, you can’t. Please stop.
  21. corate identity timeline
  22. corporate advertising print calendar design portfolio Please be more specific…
  23. corporate identi ai Consult your dicti aie first.
  24. cymk and you get a fifth color printing CMYK and you get four colors, hence the CMY and K.
  25. desiner logo portafolio Yes, right next to the portobello mushrooms and Chianti.
  26. do most graphic designers fail? Why are you asking me this? What are you implying.
  27. does it take longer to scan 300 dpi or 72 dpi I’ll give you one guess.
  28. download fonte futura No, you can’t download free “real” fonts.
  29. download top 100 fonts No, you can’t download free “real” fonts, still.
  30. dr sketching arthouse Sorry, Dr. Sketching is not availabe. He’s at the Arthouse.
  31. effect on project when changing project hourly rate You lose the client, that’s all.
  32. film resolution dpi Film does not have resolution…it’s film.
  33. font combinaties Try again at google.fr
  34. font combonations “I’ll have the Helvetica burger with a side of Futura fries.”
  35. font comninations
  36. font most used in school New Century Schoolbook, silly!
  37. four thing u have to do in graphic design R u asking me 2 du this 4 u?
  38. freelance designer fail OK, this whole fail thing is getting my goat…
  39. freelance graphic design opinions david airey Do you really want to know what I think of David Airey? C’mon, look at his mad logo design skillz?
  40. freelance graphic designer how to invoice australia I would start with a $1million AU bill to the “King of Australia” and see what happens.
  41. freelance graphic designer rephrase “Rephrase freelance designer of graphics” – how’s that?
  42. frelance sma k, sre.
  43. graphic design+pdf+do comment boxes print? You have 3 questions here. Try 3 different searches in a row.
  44. graphic designer: it’s cool being one It’s definitely cool being me, and such.
  45. how to draw simple easy amazing things on a blank sheet of white Just get a pencil and paper and draw like Leonardo – how else would you do this? Silly question…
  46. how to fix a fifth color in cmyk Your problem is due in large part to a lack of a fifth color being present to be able to fix.
  47. how to go from 72 to 300 dpi for printing Listen: you can’t.
  48. how to print a web page in 300 dpi on paper You are still not listening. You can’t. For many reasons beyond the scope of…you.
  49. how to print on 300 dpi How to print on 300 dpi what? Hmmm. Go to Staples and ask for 300 dpi paper, maybe.
  50. i am going to tell you one more time I’m all ears!
  51. i just got my degree in graphic design and i dont have a portfolio You may have gotten ripped off at your college.
  52. i’m a graphic designer where do i get printed? It’s kind of a chicken-and-egg thing now, isn’t it!
  53. i’m graphic designer and i need to get clients I’m client – let’s get 2 gether!
  54. i’m i to old to be a graphic designer Yes, the heavy lifting does exclude certain age groups from this physically demanding line of work.
  55. if the web is 72 dpi why are higher res images better quality Because higher res images are better quality, which has nothing to do with the web.
  56. ikea caint But, ikea cain after all! I’ve see it!
  57. im gonna be graphic designer Go get’em tiger!
  58. information design workbook graphic approaches solutions and inspiration plus 30 case studies I have 25 case studies – will that do?
  59. jpg is 300 dpi but opens at 72 dpi Then your jpg is not 300 dpi.
  60. like father like son spelled in all fonts Most things are spelled in all fonts, unless you are using sign language.
  61. logos of a house sketches Lost me on that one…
  62. many graphic designers are leave why? leave cuz can’t communicating client bill to financial pays.
  63. moleskin top hat Ewwwww!
  64. new poster for wasting things (based on graphics design)
  65. organisation’s right to inspect computers ofgraphic communications
  66. over the top font
  67. pdf art tps ii
  68. pdf font like verdana What is a PDF font? And why do you want one like Verdana? Don’t we already have enough Verdana in the world?
  69. photoshop resolution 72 dpi to 300 dpi NO!
  70. photoshop resulution 72-dpi to 300-dpi N-O-!
  71. ping pong design in alphabetical order
  72. prefered font for email Use Helvetica, which is faster than Times Roman because it has no serifs. Also, studies have shown 6pt Helvetica to be faster than 12pt Helvetica because it’s smaller.
  73. printing higher than 72 dpi on web pages No. Stop it.
  74. printing web resolution higher than 72 dpi You really need to stop it.
  75. production possibility is a graphical combination which a society can use for resources Please consult the Flux Capacitor manual for more instruction. One may be located on the TARDIS.
  76. pros and cons of a graphic designer Pro: I’m good. Con: I’m expensive.
  77. questions i need to ask my im designing a website
  78. responsibilities of the warehousing head
  79. screen resolution 72 lines
  80. site web top 10 de freelance en art graphique Oui!
  81. some things graphic designer would design for a client Like maybe a logo, a website, a mug, a book, a poster. Let me think of a few more when I get some time.
  82. this is going to be the final design Agreed.
  83. tips til pdf print When waiting for the PDF to print, you can 1) surf the web, 2) get coffee, 3) check out twitter or 4) look at your Google Analytics stats for strange things.
  84. top fints I think a blog dedicated to typigraphy might have an answer for you.
  85. unpaid freelance graphic design work in photoshop Who told you I did that?
  86. we always look out for freelancer Yes, and when you find one, you put a big hat on him that says “sucker”. See # 85.
  87. website grader – do it work? It do work!
  88. what are the four things that we can draw We can draw 1) a potato, 2) a cow, 3) a car and 4) a vase. Other than those, we don’t know if we can draw anything else.
  89. what is a graphic designers job in the printing process To make the pre-press technician very, very upset that he can’t say out loud how dumb most graphic designers are :).
  90. what is anice font for wall writing Most graffiti artists just kind of make up their own fonts.
  91. what is most popular font for drawings? That might be “chicken scratch” but I’d have to confirm.
  92. what percentage of graphic designers are excellent at design? About 3%.
  93. where should a graphic designer live Near a cafe with free wi-fi.
  94. why all graphic designers must use I think it’s simply customary that in fact all graphic designers must use.
  95. why do designers like akzidenz grotesk Why does Elvis like Rock and Roll?
  96. why dont graphic designer likes verdana I like Verdana, just not when Ikea uses it…
  97. why should i be a graphic designer Nobody says you have to be a graphic designer…
  98. will the role of the graphic designer and design have changed in any way? I can’t tell if this question is going to happen or if it will have happenend.
  99. top 10 fints I know the top 3 are Hilvitici, Girimind, and Fitiri.
  100. what is a one color print job It’s a print job with…one color. But it could also be a four color job, as long as all four colors are the same.

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Comments

  4. Gotta admit it’s funny, but you should realize not every designer speaks English with a native tongue. I sometimes make mistakes when i google topics myself. Sometimes by excident i type a dutch word instead of the english version. I can relate to the visitor who searched on exact words and numbers. Sometimes when you’ve read a post somewhere on the internet and you can’t remember what blog it was on, the best thing to do is search on keywords that where in the title of the post.

  5. Hi Leon: I know, and can tell, some of these are not native speakers of English. So, indeed, the humor is a bit at their expense no doubt for some of these. It’s funny for the same reason failblog.org and engrish.com are funny. Funny things happen unintentionally all the time. It’s a little bit of delight we should all dabble in from time to time, while being sure to laugh the most at our own personal foibles. Maybe someday I’ll post a “Top 10 Lame Graphic Design Posts of All Time from BonFX”. No doubt I’ll have a lot to chose from :).

  7. My favourite: “what percentage of graphic designers are excellent at design?”
    That’s funny.

    Favourite of mine from this month: wqordpress theme minialism

    1 for 3.

  8. Hi Alex: Sorry, I use only vector stitches. Although you can rip the vector stitches in Photoshop at 300dpi, I still would not do it. Bitmap stitches are always larger, and take longer to heal :).

  10. I love to LOL, and your blog entry was a great way to start my day. My favorites: where should a graphic designer live. Near a cafe with free wi-fi AND i just got my degree in graphic design and i dont have a portfolio. You may have gotten ripped off at your college.

    Talking about portfolios, I’m a newbie to website design (but not graphic design), with NO design degree. What is the best and most efficient way to build a porfolio in 6 months?

  11. Hi Patricia: I don’t have a design degree either. My background is Fine Art which led to illustration which led to graphic design which led to web design. The question for me lately has been how do I get out of web design :). Just kidding.

    Let me be frank: the best way to build a portfolio is to advertise free services and build some real sites for some real (free) clients. Once you complete 5-6 projects, you’ll be on your way and will have a legitimate portfolio, paying work will find you as you continue to spread the word. A second best option is to create fictional work, but this type of work is less convincing, as it’s not solving a real problem. “Faked” work can be good, but most new designers don’t get enough of the “fakeness” out of their design and it can look a bit hokey. But give those 2 ideas a whirls and I’m sure you’ll be golden…

  12. Since I started reading this, I didn’t stop laughing for about 10 minutes. Reading 100 funny typos truly made my day. (And I was sad just 5 minutes ago because I screwed my 1TB Backup Drive up)

    Favorites: “why should i be a graphic designer”, “what is most popular font for drawings?” and “what are the four things we can draw”.

  13. Laugh all you want, but these unintelligible Engrish queries are the sound of your future trans-Pacific competitors, charging less than $1/hour for work that most of the general public can’t distinguish from yours.

  15. Bowan: They just might be having the last laugh! And then all us English-speakers will be making unspeakably funny typos in other languages as we scramble for work on the other side of the world :(. Hopefully though we can all get a long and laugh at each others typos :).

  18. If you get “designer” a lot, it’s probably because I’m on your site a lot :). That must be my number one personal typo. As far as retweets go, it’s nice to know a few people with some huge twitter followings :).

  19. How cool is that. I made a typo spelling a typo and inadvertently spelled “desinger” as “designer”, because I do make the “desinger” typo a lot, as I mentioned, above, and spelled the incorrect spelling incorrectly as the correct spelling. Hmmph.

    So, yes, I do type “desinger” all teh time. 🙂

  21. Hilarious post! I am laughing out loud at the stats, then I’m laughing again because most people don’t get why this is so flippin’ funny! I will have to say that my ‘favorite’ request is the one for converting images from 72 to 300 dpi. They always ask, “Can’t you just do something to it in Photoshop or something?” Or, “Don’t you have software for that?” Thanks for the laugh – I needed that! 🙂

  22. Hi Visage: You wouldn’t believe the hits I get for the 72 dpi to 300 dpi question. It’s one of the most popular articles, but was never intended to be. Just for ha-ha’s, here is a list of JUST searches that contain the literal string “72 dpi”. There are many creative twists on the search for the elusive dpi information, but I thought I’d just do these for an example. This list taken from stats since the article was published is unedited for your amusement:

    what happens when you print a image that is 72 dpi
    can i print a 72 dpi image
    print 72 dpi
    web resolution 72 dpi
    100 dpi or 72 dpi for web
    300 dpi better than 72 dpi
    300 dpi to 72 dpi
    600 dpi to 72 dpi
    600 over 72 dpi
    72 dpi
    72 dpi blown up
    72 dpi for web
    72 dpi for web psd
    72 dpi higher than 300 dpi
    72 dpi image to 600 dpi?
    72 dpi laser printing process
    72 dpi level 10
    72 dpi or 96 dpi
    72 dpi print 300dpi web
    72 dpi print or web
    72 dpi printed
    72 dpi printing
    72 dpi printing size
    72 dpi standard
    72 dpi to 300 dpi converter chart
    72 dpi vs 150 dpi vs 300 dpi
    72 dpi vs 300 dpi “”for the web””
    72 dpi vs 300 dpi in print
    72 dpi web resolution
    96 dpi vs 72 dpi
    can i print at 72 dpi
    can we print from 72 dpi
    can you go from 72 dpi to 300dpi
    can you go over 72 dpi
    can you print 72 dpi?
    can you print a 72 dpi image
    color print 72 dpi
    converting 72 dpi 300 dpi
    converting 72 dpi 300 dpi mac
    converting from 72 dpi to 300 dpi to print
    design at 72 dpi or 96 dpi
    design in 72 dpi or 300
    design websites at 72 dpi or 96
    do you have to print 72 dpi
    does it take longer to scan 300 dpi or 72 dpi
    elements 5 72 dpi vs 300 dpi
    email larger than 72 dpi
    file 72 dpi printer
    going below 72 dpi for web
    how much 72 dpi
    if the web is 72 dpi why are higher res images better quality
    is all web 72 dpi?
    jpg for web 72 dpi
    jpg is 300 dpi but opens at 72 dpi
    online graphics resolution 72 dpi or 96 dpi standard
    paper 72 dpi 300 dpi
    photoshop print 300 dpi as 72 dpi
    photoshop resolution 72 dpi to 300 dpi
    print screen quality 72 dpi
    printing 72 dpi images
    printing 72 dpi jpeg photoshop
    printing at 72 dpi chart
    printing higher than 72 dpi on web pages
    printing web resolution higher than 72 dpi
    resolution web standard 72 dpi
    screen resolution 72 dpi
    screen resolution 72 dpi web
    should you rez up a 72 dpi photo to 300 dpi in order to enlarge it or reduce it for use in offset printing?
    sketches 72 dpi web
    standard web graphic 72 dpi
    up res 72 dpi graphics
    web 72 dpi
    web 72 dpi or 96 dpi
    web 72 dpi pixels
    web design 72 dpi or 300 dpi
    web design and 72 dpi
    web for print 300 dpi 72 dpi
    web or more 72 dpi
    web page resolution 72 dpi
    what happens when you print at 72 dpi
    what resolution should i design for 300 dpi 72 dpi
    what size can i print 72 dpi
    which is better quality 72 dpi or 300
    which takes longer to scan 72 dpi or 300 dpi
    why 72 dpi for screen
    why do graphics designers use 72 dpi
    why is the web 72 dpi
    why is web resolution 72 dpi?
    why screen resolution 72 dpi
    will 72 dpi print 300 dpi
    will a 72 dpi image print out well?

  23. All this funnnnnnnny stuff dude your soooo funny ha ha ha!
    As Bill Hicks said if you work in advertising go kill your self.

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